I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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