my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
