I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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