I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
