erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
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