So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
