kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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