Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions. http://tfl.nu/8b19
  Replies (5) Good night (2971) Bad night (485)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back? http://tfl.nu/0voi
  Replies (35) Good night (775) Bad night (3418)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I knew I fell for you for a reason

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on (908): I knew I fell for you for a reason http://tfl.nu/lpgl
  Replies (17) Good night (3423) Bad night (1028)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger. http://tfl.nu/4opy
  Replies (7) Good night (828) Bad night (2253)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song? http://tfl.nu/zr38
  Replies (26) Good night (3203) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge. http://tfl.nu/3ppt
  Replies (5) Good night (4602) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk http://tfl.nu/fnmq
  Replies (4) Good night (2931) Bad night (1081)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine. http://tfl.nu/dm6s
  Replies (22) Good night (1054) Bad night (3072)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch http://tfl.nu/wvpl
  Replies (7) Good night (2381) Bad night (632)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner http://tfl.nu/cdsa
  Replies (9) Good night (2097) Bad night (760)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed. http://tfl.nu/hmgx
  Replies (10) Good night (493) Bad night (1448)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick! http://tfl.nu/u1do
  Replies (15) Good night (939) Bad night (1146)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy. http://tfl.nu/3zpx
  Replies (2) Good night (805) Bad night (276)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises. http://tfl.nu/t2bs
  Replies (4) Good night (1031) Bad night (241)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together http://tfl.nu/fgbj
  Replies (0) Good night (424) Bad night (151)

Randomize