I'm drive I can fine osifer
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
