This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
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He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
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I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
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