I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
thus making me awesome and them whores
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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