How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
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I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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