He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
