Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize