He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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