Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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