So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
