R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
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I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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