i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Randomize
