so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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