lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
