Texts From Last Night

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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?

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  (740): I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover? http://tfl.nu/ok2o
  Replies (13) Good night (8159) Bad night (831)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.

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  (419): we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it. http://tfl.nu/duoc
  Replies (37) Good night (3520) Bad night (4778)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.

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  (330): just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this. http://tfl.nu/6gzz
  Replies (10) Good night (5986) Bad night (1010)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."

  (1-806): View more from Texas

  Best pick-up line ever!

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  (806): You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck." (1-806): Best pick-up line ever! http://tfl.nu/plrf
  Replies (35) Good night (9903) Bad night (1318)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved

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  (518): you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved http://tfl.nu/hfsv
  Replies (15) Good night (4149) Bad night (875)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same

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  (208): I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same http://tfl.nu/tmvd
  Replies (3) Good night (1823) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?

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  (714): There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed? http://tfl.nu/o0fs
  Replies (11) Good night (766) Bad night (1800)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.

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  (207): Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far. http://tfl.nu/heu3
  Replies (16) Good night (1961) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.

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  (712): My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men. http://tfl.nu/xu6z
  Replies (3) Good night (803) Bad night (434)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.

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  (416): Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd. http://tfl.nu/inv3
  Replies (8) Good night (633) Bad night (863)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?

  (1-443): View more from Maryland

  The pinata full of drugs?

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  (443): What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing? (1-443): The pinata full of drugs? http://tfl.nu/09ic
  Replies (6) Good night (992) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.

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  (202): Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there. http://tfl.nu/rixv
  Replies (3) Good night (355) Bad night (907)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.

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  (217): Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack. http://tfl.nu/wwoa
  Replies (3) Good night (863) Bad night (309)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...

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  (808): I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal... http://tfl.nu/l81c
  Replies (1) Good night (198) Bad night (329)
• Favorite

  (448): View more from

  My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today

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  (448): My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today http://tfl.nu/if8s
  Replies (1) Good night (473) Bad night (134)

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