Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
