A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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