...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
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the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
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I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.