Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge

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  (305) 1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge http://tfl.nu/8lgu
  Replies (5) Good night (814) Bad night (1692) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.

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  (724): And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after. http://tfl.nu/p612
  Replies (38) Good night (5802) Bad night (785) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.

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  (+44): At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever. http://tfl.nu/bxy4
  Replies (17) Good night (8376) Bad night (750) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.

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  (814): If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know. http://tfl.nu/ag02
  Replies (7) Good night (2115) Bad night (1520) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend

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  (850): i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend http://tfl.nu/u4us
  Replies (48) Good night (4073) Bad night (2787) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.

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  (505): Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later. http://tfl.nu/q053
  Replies (25) Good night (1535) Bad night (3091) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?

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  (715): hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes? http://tfl.nu/o98x
  Replies (9) Good night (5518) Bad night (612) Order T-Shirt
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  (858): View more from California

  Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.

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  (858): Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process. http://tfl.nu/ba8i
  Replies (2) Good night (1074) Bad night (485) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.

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  (402): I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really. http://tfl.nu/wq20
  Replies (13) Good night (1235) Bad night (681)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.

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  (586): My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage. http://tfl.nu/u2i7
  Replies (5) Good night (2432) Bad night (428) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.

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  (901): Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician. http://tfl.nu/nnrt
  Replies (7) Good night (1846) Bad night (447)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  . Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.

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  (615): . Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this. http://tfl.nu/oczw
  Replies (6) Good night (1176) Bad night (287) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?

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  (720): Passed out drunk in a tanning bed... (303): Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time? http://tfl.nu/3i4a
  Replies (4) Good night (744) Bad night (470)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.

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  (937): That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor. http://tfl.nu/5gnj
  Replies (2) Good night (398) Bad night (160) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?

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  (604): Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You? http://tfl.nu/pz94
  Replies (4) Good night (375) Bad night (709)

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