Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
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