she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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