why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Drunk is not a location!
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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