So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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