yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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