We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
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