Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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