So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Semen is not good for contacts.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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