K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
