i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize