none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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