Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I will pee on everything he values.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Randomize
