This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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