I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Randomize