She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize