He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Randomize