I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
FUCK WHALES
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
