i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
false alarm, still single
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
