Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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