don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
