I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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