was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
