If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Don't make out with my wife yet
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize