As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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